closings and weddings

The Borders by me is closing and everything is on sale + My friend is getting married = I thought it would be funny to get her a gag gift (pun intended)

I tried to find one with the most jarring title/cover and ended up with the following:

CLICK HERE - Clearly NSFW

This is the conversation I had with the geeky, overweight, balding clerk that was behind the cash register:

Guy: Would you like a bag?

Me: a bag? Yes. Yes I would like a bag.